Psycho Neighbour Goes Psycho

It was a miracle it didn't happen sooner, but here it is. The downstairs neighbours have flipped their lids completely yet again. Here's what happened.

It was a Monday evening. I came home from work, cooked a meal, washed up the dishes. So far, so boring. It was hot in the flat, so I opened the kitchen window and decided to have a cigarette to cool down. Without thinking, I flicked a little fag ash. From then, all I heard was a cacophany of hatred and bile. Windows were shaking and the two downstairs neighbours were in the yard yelling stuff like "Don't you fucking dare do that... this is private property... you're fucking bang out of line... you slam the doors too much(?)..." and so on and so on. So, I took my freshly lit cigarette and immediately put it under the tap to extinguish it. Then I popped it into the bin. So, I leant out of the window to say I had done this, and happened to shake some water from my hand - the one which was holding the fag under the tap. This was another red rag to this pair of miserable pair of bull(shitters). Again, the abuse and screaming started up, but this time much much louder. I took exception to this and started having a go back, asking them who they are to talk to people like that. Anyway, after a bit of shouting, I laughed it off, and they didn't like that. Closing my window, I called them psychos.

One hour later I was visited by two of the Met's finest. Well, one of the Met's finest who was accompanied by a lad who looked like he only just did his GCSE's. Anyway, apparently there were complaints of me flicking lots of ash AND cigarettes out of my window as well as pouring water down from my window! Yes, pouring water out of my window!!! Anyway, I explained the situation to the officers...

I explained how this couple threatened me on the day I picked up the keys to the flat (before I even moved in). How they assaulted the previous tenants in the street in front of the Letting Agents. How they threatened and continue to intimidate my immediate neighbours on this floor. How I complained to the landlord and agents for them to do something. How I took legal advice about moving out. How I took Police advice about nuisance neighbours. I think the two officers responded well to my side of the story. They went to speak to the boys next door and then they said they would speak to the nuisance neighbours themselves again.

There are no winners in all of this. No doubt I haven't heard the end of this, but I'll be fucked if I am in any way intimidated by these wankers. I haven't seen anyone this unreasonably aggressive and angry since I worked for barry Ritchie in Brighton all those years ago. The press dubbed him the "Worst boss in Britian"...